I'm Not OK-I Promise

Tuesday, 19 March 2013

This won't be my most well written post...or say half of the things I would like to. I’ve wrote about this before…in fact that post was one of my proudest thus far…and I may appear to be somewhat of a broken record on this subject but it appears that no matter how many times people hear it, the message does not quite register. So all together now:
Rape is an act of violence NOT a natural hazard.
This post is a reaction to two things…the first was a post from someone on my facebook
When I saw this I sat for a good few minutes in shock. Shock that it appeared I was associated with someone with such a warped and pathetic view of humour and shocked that this could at any point even be considered funny. I have quite a dark sense of humour, I find the funny side in most things but the idea that someone could be so ignorant and blasé about such a violent act on a public forum left me aghast. The only thing worse was the bottom feeders that encouraged it with a ‘like’ and yes this included women.
The second thing that spurred this rant was the ‘Steubenville (Ohio) Rape’ and more poignantly the reaction to the guilty verdict. Prevalent in a lot of the coverage of this trial was the shared sympathy. Sympathy in a rape case seems totally normal right? Well not really, the sympathy wasn’t aimed at the girl who was violated and assaulted and raped…oh no it was to the two boys that did it. In fact the ACTUAL victim in the case has received a barrage of abuse and fallen victim a second time but this time to the people that should be supporting her.
These are the kind of boys we should 'feel sorry' for, classmates of the rapists who can be hear saying "She got that drunk though", "She might have wanted it, she couldn't say" and other horrifying views on what had happened.
*Roll up, roll up* Take a look at the comments on the CCN article, be amazed at the horrifying attitudes towards a victim. There is even a suggestion she should be trialled as an accomplice in her OWN rape? I mean…seriously? People still think like this?
It seems even in 2013 a time when we make so many wonderful advances  we still don’t seem to grasp the simple concept that NOTHING a girl can do is her asking to be raped or assaulted or even catcalled. Nothing.
Us ladies can wear a short dress, drink a little too much, flirt, enjoy sex, have a previous sexual relationship with the person and none of that makes us vulnerable to rape. The only thing that makes us vulnerable to an assault is the assailant. The only person ever at fault is the person that decides that they are entitled to someone else whether they like it or not… because there is not a girl in the world who would choose to be treated as less than human.
A drunk girl at a party? Yes she is vulnerable, yes drinking to the point of a black out isn’t the wisest of decisions but that is because you know it isn’t great for your health and you will be vulnerable to a hefty hangover but how about we all agree to leave the slightly messy girl alone to sleep it off and NOT decide to penetrate her body and violate her in an act of violence? We all agreed? Cool
Now let’s work on your stupid sense of humour next


  1. One of the comments really shocked me 'all they did was with fingers demonstrates how innocent these boys are' their opinion of innocent is to be very morally corrupt , illegal and wrong?! It's enough to show that the opinions of so many falls to victim blaming :( x

  2. Brilliant post my dear! BLOWING MY MIND WITH THEIR COMMENTS. It makes my blood boil. Recently Joanna Lumley was mouthing off about girls in short skirts inviting trouble. COME ON PEOPLE lets all get a grip here and stop blaming clothing. Blurgh. This is my least favourite comment:

    "All of this might had been avoided if the girl had not committed Under Aged Drinking . Telling women ways they can protect themselves is the best way of preventing these situations. Society needs to pound it into females' heads that most rape is preventable with a little less drinking and a little more self respect."

    WHAT THE FLIP. xxx

  3. I honestly can't believe people think that she brought it on herself and that she should be trialed. What people go around thinking 'oh there's a drunk girl, I'll just molest her' ?!

  4. Amazing post, I have been actually dumbstruck by the coverage of this assault. It's a VERY sad sick world we seem to live in :( you are amazing for writing this xxx

  5. HERE HERE. Very well said my love. Some people... there are honestly no words. xxx

  6. Happened to stumble upon this post and I agree, it is INFURIATING. In respect to the CNN coverage - I cannot believe that the sole focus in the case was how we should feel sympathy for the boys, completely disregarding the victim.

    Its so empowering to see women who feel strongly about this, with coverage like this, you tend to feel as if we're fighting a losing battle.


  7. Awesome publish, I have been actually dumbstruck by the protection of this attack. It's a VERY sad fed up world we seem to reside in.



Thank you for all your lovely comments :)